Wednesday, December 15, 2004
Is Yanukovych The Disney Candidate?
1. Have a Happy "Give a Lesbian a Balloon Day"
2. "What corrupt capitalist running dog media fail to realize is that dioxin is traditional ingredient in Ukrainian gulag... I mean, goulash
3. Another Obscure Reference "I was walking up Sixth Avenue/When Balloon man came right up to me/He was round and fat and spherical/with the biggest grin I'd ever seen..."
4. Actor/comedian Howie Mendel was brutally strangled today by a really scary butch lesbian.
5. Nice try, but you're still not getting into Michael Jackson's house.
6. With Scully and Mulder hot on his trail, the alien morphed into Girls Phys. Ed. Teacher and tried to hide his anal probe inside a festive balloon.
7. "... when they came for the anthropomorphic animated mice, I didn't care because I wasn't an anthropomorphic animated mouse..."
8. Why the Ukrainian Communist Party adopted Drew Carey's prostate as its symbol is indeed a mystery.
9. Slightly Less Obscure Reference Ukrainian Communist Party candidate "Pennywise" at a rally where thousands chanted his slogan, "We all float down here."
10. "Winning this election will be as easy as taking a balloon from a child... after the child has been poisoned with dioxin.