Wednesday, November 17, 2004
Sorry Losers, Part IX
Yet another dejected loser from sorry-everybody-dot-com.
1. Still trying to figure out what happened? I'm guessing it started to go wrong the first time he cut math to smoke pot in the boys bathroom.
2. Doah would soon learn why “Bear Cubs in Distress” was the worst possible choice for a “Sounds of Nature” tape to take on a trip to Yellowstone.
3. “George W. Bush put me out of work and now I live at a rest area… OK, it was actually partly because of showing up to the plant drunk, punching the foreman in the throat, and having to leave the state to avoid child support payments… but mostly it was because of George W. Bush.”
4. Doah fancied himself a modern-day Thoreau, and the Rest-Stop on I-94 was his Walden. Of course, Thoreau didn’t have to put up with the g-dd-mned State Police. Public Intoxication, my ass. G-dd-mn Ashcroft.”
5. Somehow, this picture isn’t complete without “Dueling Banjos” and Ned Beatty squealing in the background.
6. Nice of the webmaster to crop out the toilet and replace it with a picnic scene, don’t you think.
7. “Hmm, maybe over there would be a good spot to bury the hitch-hiker I got in the coolers.”
8. DoahRat adheres to the letter of the restraining order and camps exactly 151 feet outside Al Franken’s door.
9. His hippie wife Rainbow approved of his technique for “natural organic lawn fertilization” but to his kids, it was a constant source of embarrassment.
10. Well, at least he can comfort himself with his Golden Cockring award from the International Mr. Leather Pageant. (Upper Left quadrant of photo)